


Mirror, Mirror in His Hand

by ElReyCiervo



Series: Yulmallen AU Drabbles [6]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Allen Can't Catch a Break, Alma lives, Angst, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Multi, Nonbinary Alma Karma, Nonbinary Character, Other, Polyamory, Yulmallen, Yulmallen AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-02
Updated: 2016-12-02
Packaged: 2018-09-06 02:36:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8731459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElReyCiervo/pseuds/ElReyCiervo
Summary: Drabble #6) No matter how loved they tell Allen he is, Allen can't help but hide in secrets sometimes. Neah rears his ugly head, Alma brings food, and Link is considerate.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own D. Gray-Man

While Allen, Kanda, and Alma were attached by the hip more often than not, there were times where they had to separate to get work done. Like now, for example. Kanda was off on a mission a few towns over in order to retrieve a piece of Innocence, and Allen was off doing his own thing. He had told Alma earlier that he needed a bit of time to himself, and Alma respected that. They had assumed that Allen just needed time to breathe and such, because as much as the three of them loved each other, it was absolutely certain that they wanted to throttle each other every once in a while. Why, just yesterday, they had to get in between Allen and Kanda to prevent blood from being spilled (over blanket-hogging, of all things).

Alma shook their head at the memory, smile quirking their lips upwards. _I don’t know what I would do without those two and their spats. Then again, I’m no better._ Without meaning it, they had put Allen and Kanda in the hospital with food poisoning. Twice.

“Here you go, hun~!” Jerry’s voice broke through their thoughts. The pink-haired man handed Alma a bowl of fruit, dango and donuts, smiling at Alma.

Alma grinned back at Jerry, taking the food. “Thank you, Jerry! I’m sure Allen will really enjoy this.”

Before they could leave, Jerry winked at them and pointed his mixing spoon towards the bowl. “I slipped in something for you, too. Egg salad with extra mayonnaise in a little container, sweetie.”

_Oh, Jerry was so thoughtful_. Alma was always so happy to come talk to Jerry, even if it was only for a few minutes. The Indian cook was one of the few people that truly cared about those who worked in the Order. “You’re the best, Jerry.”

“No problem. Now go see your little lover boy.”

And with that Alma made their way over to Allen’s room. They weren’t quite sure what Allen was up to, but they were positive he would appreciate the food. Allen never denied food. As they slipped into the hall that led to Allen’s room, they saw Link standing outside Allen’s door, leaning against the wall. _I thought Link was supposed to stay with Allen all the time. And why does he have that expression on his face?_ Link had his arms crossed, and head tilted towards the floor. Even at that angle, Alma could see the tenseness around his flared, blonde eyebrows; the tightening around his crimson eyes; and the muscle working in his jaw. The weight weighing down his shoulders was visible even from where Alma stood.

They took a few steps closer until they neared Link. The inspector did not seem to notice the Second, which was highly unlike him. Alma knew that Link prided himself in his sharp situational awareness. To see the blonde so distracted was worrying.

“Link?” they called. The man still had not taken notice of Alma, so they repeated a little louder. “Link!”

The Inspector snapped his head toward Alma’s voice, body jerking to stiff attention. “A-Alma Karma. I assumed you would be with Jerry for a few more hours.”

“Just Alma, Link,” they said on reflex. “And, I was with Jerry, but only to grab some food for Allen and I. I thought he would appreciate the snacks while he’s doing whatever he’s doing.” The partially opened door leaked out Allen’s voice, and if Alma wasn’t mistaken, it sounded like he was talking to someone. They could not quite make out what he was saying, but the tone was cutting and terse. _Who is he talking to?_ There weren’t many people that Allen let in his room; Link and Alma were out here, Kanda and Lenalee were on their own missions, and Lavi was in the library. If it was not one of them, then who…? Link’s uncomfortable expression and Allen’s sharp-as-glass tone did not make Alma feel at ease. “What…What _is_ he doing, Link?”

Link shot a loaded look at the door, then back to Alma.“He and the Fourteenth have been communicating for several hours now.”

A cold feeling gushed through their veins. _He’s doing **what**_? Ever since they came back to the Order, Allen tried his hardest _not_ to be in contact with Neah if possible. _Did he contact Neah, or did Neah contact him? Is Neah toying with him again???_

Their shock and worry must have physically bled into their face because Link went on to explain, “Allen told me to keep you away as he did not want you to be concerned; however,” crimson eyes flickered to the door warily then back to them. “I can’t keep you away if I never saw you. I can only offer you ten minutes, otherwise one of the _other_ guards might notice me away from my post.” Ever since their return to the Order—Link, Allen, Kanda, Johnny, and Alma—Leverrier was especially prudent on keeping an eye on them. Guards from Central roamed the castle freely, keen eyes tracking their every move. “Use your time wisely.” Saying that, Link was quick to walk away and turn the corner, leaving Alma in front of the door. To say that Link was an uptight person was an understatement, but Alma did appreciate the moment of privacy that he offered them.

Hovering next to the door, palm pressed against the wood, Alma felt like they were being nosy. Listening into a conversation, although it sounded like a one-way conversation to their ears, felt wrong…felt like they were breaking Allen’s trust. Allen was a very private person, even to his lovers sometimes. This snooping put Alma ill at ease, but dammit to hell Allen was Alma’s lover, and that meant they would care for Allen—even if that meant eavesdropping from time to time.

Alma glanced through the crack of the door and could see Allen sitting on the edge of his bed, glaring at a small hand mirror in his hand. Luckily from this angle they could see the reflection in the mirror, and was confused to see just Allen’s porcelain face. _Why would he be glaring at himself?_ As they tilted their ear closer to the door to pick up Allen’s hushed voice, they could finally make out the conversation. “—don’t care how much you hate humans, you are _not_ killing anyone at this Order.”

A pause. “I agree. Humans are the cause of so much pain and destruction, but that doesn’t mean that you can go and hurt people just because you feel like it.” Another pause, which was followed by a derisive snort. “Even that bastard from Central, yes.”

“I know we have to leave soon…” He trailed off, looking at his hand. “But that does not mean I am happy about it, you know.”

_‘Leave soon?’ Where is he going?_ Alma felt a cold gush of panic race through them. _Is he leaving us???_

Allen looked back into the mirror. “We are not doing this again, Neah. We came to an agreement before we got here that this is my body, not yours. I’m not a puppet for your use.”

They counted a full two minutes pass by before they saw Allen shift and full-out scowl at the mirror. “Listen here, you piece of _shite_ ,” his voice turned low with warning and anger, startling Alma. It was rare that they had ever heard Allen like this: so dangerous, so venomous like a cornered, hurt snake. “You **will not** lay a finger on either of them, no matter what they have to do with this convoluted plan of yours. You will do them no harm, or so help me I will not give you the _chance_ to even _see_ the Earl again, let alone fight him…Do I make myself clear, Neah?”

There was another pause, and Alma assumed that Neah must have said something unpleasant because Allen’s eyes widened and he stood up then cocked back his arm holding the mirror. Before they knew what they were doing, Alma burst into the room just as Allen was about to throw the mirror. “Stop!”

Allen froze, head swiveling and gaze landing on Alma. “A-Alma! What are you doing here?”

There was a tangible energy charging the air, but Alma was certain that wasn’t the cause for the hair on their arms standing on end. They slowly raised the arm that was holding the food. “I…I came to check on you, to bring you snacks. Thought you would have appreciated the break to whatever you were doing…” Their words died at their end of their sentence as they took in their lover: wide mercury eyes that were red at the corners, body still in the position to throw the mirror, paler than normal skin, and almost invisible tremors running through his muscles. What was he discussing that made him like this? “I should be asking you what you’re doing, Al.”

The white-haired male still stood frozen, mouth opening and closing as he attempted to figure out what to say. Finally, he just let out a long sigh and shifted his body, lowering his arm and dropping the mirror on the bed. “I…I didn’t want you to see that.” He sounded utterly drained, and there was a note of shame lacing his voice.

“How long have you been talking to Neah?”

There were a few stretched moments before the reluctant answer came. “…Ever since we returned to the Order.”

Alma let out a sharp breath, “Allen.”

“I _know_ I said I wouldn’t talk to him,” he frowned, looking away, “but….” Allen sighed, crossing his arms and still not looking at Alma. “I didn’t want you to see me acting all crazy, talking to a mirror like that.” His voice wavered at the end, and Alma tried to ignore how bitter he sounded. (1)

“You’re not crazy.”

“I have a voice in my head. How is that not crazy?”

“Allen,” Alma took a set the food on the bed and took a step towards Allen. They rested their hand on his shoulder and turned him around to face them. They used their other hand to put against Allen’s pale cheek, and he tilted his cold cheek in the warmth of their hand. They swiped their thumb under his red-rimmed eye and tried not to take notice of how starkly pale Allen’s skin was against their darker tone. “You are anything but crazy. You’re not hearing made up voices—there’s actually someone with you. And even if you were, who am I to judge, huh?” They tried for a reassuring smile.

Sliver eyelashes fluttered closed as Allen leaned his forehead against theirs. “…You don’t think I’m crazy?” he asked tentatively.

“I don’t think you’re crazy,” Alma confirmed as they kissed him. “But I do think you’re not telling me something.”

Mercury eyes reopened. “ _How much did you hear_???” He tried to wriggle out of Alma’s arms, but they would not let him.

Alma pressed Allen tight against theirself in an embrace. “Are you leaving us, Al?” Now that Allen was a constant in their life, they could not fathom a universe where he was not beside them and Yuu. They subconsciously gripped Allen tighter, not wanting to lose him.

 “…I made a deal.” _‘With the devil’_ was left unsaid. “There’s…we have a plan to—”

It was then that Link poked his head through the door, stern eyes landing on the two of them. “Ten minutes are up,” he interrupted. “A guard was giving me odd looks on the way back, so I suggest you return to Jerry, Alma Karma.” His eyes softened a little. “I’m sorry I could not afford the two of you more time.”

They knew it wasn’t Link’s fault, but Alma wished they could just stay here with Allen…and find out what he was going to say. With the utmost reluctance, Alma loosened their arms around their lover and took a step towards the door. A thrill of worry was rattling through their bones. _I thought we were done with secrets._ “You know we still have to talk about his, right, Allen?”

There was a pregnant pause before Allen said, “I know, love. I’ll tell you and Kanda when he gets back from his mission.” And there was that smile that Alma hated, the fake one dripping with heartache that Allen liked to plaster on his face to reassure others. “There’s…there’s a lot I need to talk about.”

Alma couldn’t think of anything to say, but instead nodded and offered a loving smile. Before they left the room, they turned their head over their shoulder. “Allen, I’m not quite sure what’s going on in that head of yours, but don’t forget that we love you, alright?”

“I love you, too.”

It was going to be a long night waiting for Yuu to come back tomorrow. Alma could tell they weren’t going to get much sleep tonight.

* * *

Published: 12/2/16

tumblrs: [badlydrawnyullen](http://badlydrawnyullen.tumblr.com/) and [elreyexorcista](http://elreyexorcista.tumblr.com/)

 

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the long wait! School has been keeping me very, very busy! Also, thank you to taeleaves for leaving a comment last installment. I hope everyone enjoyed this one. I tried to write this one a little longer than usual to make up for my absence. 
> 
> *Gasps* What is this??? A hint of an actual plot??? Well, you guys will have to stick around to find out that happens next. Next installment will be a direct continuation of this one. Also, the Yulmallen AU Drabbles will still be continuing; however, I'm afraid that I can only post them once a month now instead of twice a month. I really have to focus on school.


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